The Secret Lives of Introverts: Inside Our Hidden World Paperback – August 1, 2017

I’m an introvert and always wanted to learn more about myself but, always came across false information online or other sources. This book is perfectly written and factual information without being boring. The storytelling is amazing and in an evening I got half way through the book.

If you're like me, you may have lived most of your life knowing you are an introvert but not appreciating what it means or how likely that temperament is to manifest in certain ways. I found "The Secret Lives of Introverts: Inside Our Hidden World" after stumbling upon a post on the author's blog. The book started by rather succinctly summing up a lot about who I am as a person, which hooked me early on, but from there it proceeded toward a less focused conclusion with slightly mixed results along the way.As others have noted, the author makes frequent references to her blog. I did not find that bothersome, because those references mostly just explain how she arrived at some figures she then shares in the book itself (i.e. she polled people on the site and more than 400 of them responded with their answers to a particular question). The blog references aren't advertorial, then; they simply provide context, and you can easily enough follow her ideas without ever visiting the blog.One thing I did notice is that while the book concludes with a meaty bibliography containing quite a lot of references divided by chapter, which is extremely useful. The text itself doesn't get weighed down with academic citations or the sterile approach academics prefer. Rather, the author keeps her tone breezy and approachable. While I do think her most precise audience would be the typical working professional in their 20s, there's a lot here for introverts of any age. I myself am in my early 40s.As I noted at the start of this review, I've lived most of my life up to this point knowing I'm an introvert but not appreciating what that really means. That casual acquaintance with the label has impacted any relationships I might develop with others, and it certainly has impacted my professional life. I've been enormously frustrated with work over the last 25 or so years I've been part of the workforce. The book points out that introverts can find success and comfort working virtually any job, but there are three jobs that tend to satisfy them least readily. Guess what? Out of all of the lines of work I might have pursued, I've worked almost exclusively in the very three jobs least likely to accommodate my introverted self!One neat bonus is that I also came to realize I'm an introvert married to an introvert. You might suppose I would have easily recognize my wife as an introvert too, but I did not. I was almost sure she was an extrovert, based on how easily she can turn on the charm for a little while at a time. After reading the book, it became glaringly obvious my assumption was incorrect. So I would say that even if you don't need the dating advice the book offers (which I found to be its weakest element), you might learn something--maybe even a lot--about yourself and your partner and the sort of things you might do to enjoy greater fulfillment and mutual happiness.At the end of the day, "The Secret Lives of Introverts: Inside Our Hidden World" offers much of what its title and blurb promise, but only in an introductory capacity. I recommend it for those who are not avid readers, who just want to dip their toes in the water and explore a subject that may come to be very important to them or may not. I've already decided I will keep reading on the subject and I expect to proceed with works that dive a little deeper... particularly where negative self-talk is concerned. That has been very much a part of who I am, and apparently my introverted temperament is at least partly to blame. Who knew?

I love this book! I only wish it had been written about thirty-five years ago when my fifteen-year-old self so much needed it! I can identify with so much here: the craving for solitude, the introvert hangover (my maximum comfortable time at gatherings is usually about two hours), the need for deep conversation rather than chit-chat, being misunderstood (no, I'm not upset, I just need to be alone), and on and on. And Resting Sad Face! OMG. At age 50, it is a startlingly gratifying thing to realize that others have had that, too. I truly thought this was something that was simply wrong with me. LOL. For decades now, my mother has smiled at me in the company of others, reminding me to smile to look more approachable...It takes courage to care for one's self according to one's deepest needs and withstand the scrutiny of others. I have learned over years that to live as I need and want to means living within a very rich solitude and "visiting the world of people" and I have learned to smile but ignore those who want me paired off or socializing more often. One thing I am still embracing: It is not selfish to take exquisite care of my sensitivity and introversion by deciding how and when to participate in the world when others seem to be able to handle the stimulation of "normal life" with ease. A HUGE thank you to the author for this book which will surely be a classic in no time. I know you will help so many of us! Please keep writing and sharing your insights. 💐

Fellow INTROVERTS- here we come! It's our turn to set the world on fire, quietly yet distinctively. This book is designed specifically for introverts, but also provides some helpful tips to (open-minded) extroverts. As a twenty-something introvert here who was bullied 10 years, pressured to be an extrovert all my life by society & family & 'friends' over 20 years, and adopted the mentality to change who I am to simply be loved and accepted by others- no more! It's time I start owning my introverted life and truly taking care of myself from the inside-out, gradually and honestly. Thank you, Jenn, for not giving up on your introversion- for it inspires me to accept it too as a strength. Those of us part of the "Introvert, dear" online community website will appreciate and probably remember some advice found from the online articles but will better understand where Jenn is coming from as an introvert herself. Overall, it is definitely a worthwhile book to read to dive deeper into the lives and perspectives of multiple introverts who share their experiences from different viewpoints yet coming together to discuss similar situations with being introverted people. ~Although extroverts can read this book, I highly recommend introverts to only read it- mainly because the book is personalized for an introvert reading it and provides understanding wherever that introvert reading it is coming from.. & I highly recommend each introvert to share insight with extroverts that they know- they are likely to listen better by someone else rather than a book, if you know what I mean.

I really enjoyed this book. If I could assign required reading to all of the extroverts I encounter on a daily basis, this would be the book I’d choose.